Stylebending Skeeter Beater Can’t Catch Coronavirus

Photo by Jeff Bottari/Zuffa LLC via Getty Images

Ultimate Fighting Championship (UFC) middleweight champion, Israel Adesanya, may prove to be the cure for coronavirus, in much the same way Will Smith used his own blood to create an antidote for the zombie-monster virus in I Am Legend.

Thanks malaria!

Fellow UFC champion, Weili Zhang, did not share his optimism, and was shipped from Beijing to Thailand, then Abu Dhabi, and eventually, Las Vegas. “Magnum” will defend her 115-pound title opposite Joanna Jedrzejczyk in the UFC 248 co-main event.

“You guys thought I had staph this week,” Adesanya continued. “I’ve never had staph in my life. Knock on wood, I never will. It was nothing. There’s no fluid. I don’t know what staph feels like. Some people have had it, where I’m from. But I’ve never had it, and I never will, knock on wood. And malaria is the biggest killer in the world, isn’t it? So, this whole corona shit – fuckin’ knock on wood, I hope I don’t get it now talking shit about corona.”

Malaria continues to terrorize regions like sub-Saharan Africa and South Asia, but does not rank in the Top 10 in terms of global mortality rates.

Whether or not Adesanya remains immune to the Romerovirus is a question we’ll have answered at the conclusion of the UFC 248 main event this Sat. night (March 7, 2020) inside T-Mobile Arena in Las Vegas, Nevada.