As if UFC president Dana White hasn’t had his fair share of feuds through the years, why not add John Oliver to the list?
It was two weeks ago, on his HBO show “Last Week Tonight,” that Oliver included the UFC in a hilarious segment on sports and the coronavirus. In it, Oliver was critical of the UFC’s return to action in Jacksonville, Fla. – which resulted in Ronaldo Souza and two cornermen testing positive for COVID-19 – and roasted the promotion for not only the idea of “Fight Island,” but also its boring name.
Oliver’s No. 1 alternative? “UF-SEA.”
As it turns out, White saw that episode and liked the name. So much so that he filed four “UFSea” trademarks with the U.S. Trademark and Patent Office, opening the door for the UFC to make money off Oliver’s idea without him getting a cut.
You didn’t think Oliver would let that happen without a retort, did you? On Sunday night’s episode of “Last Week Tonight,” Oliver pushed all in with yet another savage response (transcription via MMA Fighting):
“First, Dana White intentionally forgetting my name is a truly excellent neg. Or rather, it would be if he weren’t only number 83 on GQ’s list of the 100 most powerful bald men in the world from 2013. Now that is a neg right there, Dana. You got beat by Jason Alexander. You got Costanza’d!
“More importantly, I’m not remotely mad here. I want you to use that name. In fact, I think you should let us rename all of your events, because frankly, you’re not very good at it. Take UFC 249: It’s just your logo plus a number. Where’s the pizzazz there? How about this: ‘UFC: Knuckle Opera’? Or ‘Dust Up at the Beef Factory’? Or ‘Large Hamboy Collider’? It’s better, right? Who doesn’t want to see some ham boys collide right now? Honestly, even the name Dana White could use a little punch-up. It doesn’t sound like the head of the Ultimate Fighting Championship; it sounds like the third best real estate agent in Sacramento or a video where a white woman calls the cops on a black family for smiling too hard.”
“I am not mad at Tug Slabmeat for stealing our idea for ‘UFSea,’” Oliver continued. “We may not even be the first person he stole them from. He only filed for the ‘Fight Island’ trademark a week after a TMZ reporter suggested to him he call it that. In fact, the only thing that he’s done here that annoyed me was accusing us of using ‘selective facts,’ because facts are to me what other peoples’ ideas are to Dana White: something I’m very passionate about.”
Oliver had this to say in closing (via Twitter):
The Blue Corner is MMA Junkie’s blog space. We don’t take it overly serious, and neither should you. If you come complaining to us that something you read here is not hard-hitting news, expect to have the previous sentence repeated in ALL CAPS.
John Oliver's reaction to Dana White trademarking 'UFSea' is quite good