‘If The Peasant Asked To Be Hit, You Must Acquit’

Photo by Chris Unger/Zuffa LLC

Cejudo & Barnes! Injury attorneys, 800-888-8888!

Judge Henry Cejudo, who put the small in small claims court, has used his power as … whatever he’s calling himself these days to pardon troubled UFC welterweight Mike Perry after “Platinum” found himself on the wrong side of the law earlier this month in Lubbock, Texas.

It seems Perry was channeling his inner Buddy Revell while out to eat with his new girlfriend and went batshit crazy when some “peasant” touched him inside a local restaurant. The end result was a “fat, old man” getting knocked clean out and Perry riding the Misdemeanor Express.

Not on Judge Henry’s watch!

“Triple C is here to declare and pardon Platinum Mike Perry of innocence of all accounts!” the retired double-champ wrote on social media. “If the peasant asked to be hit, you must acquit.”

The tweet was followed by the hashtag “Free Mike Perry,” which is weird because “Platinum” was not arrested and remains free. Maybe he meant “free his mind” like that old En Vogue song?

Perry (14-6) got back into the win column with a commanding performance against welterweight submission specialist Mickey Gall in the UFC on ESPN 12 co-main event last June and appears to be getting his career back on track.

His personal life … not so much.