I Kissed A Toad (And I Liked It)

If you’re one of those mixed martial arts (MMA) fans who can’t stand the existence of celebrity boxing headliner Jake Paul, then direct all complaints to former heavyweight champion Mike Tyson — or perhaps the psychedelic toad that inspired him.

Tyson ingested venom from the Sonoran Desert Toad, clinically known as 5-MeO-DMT, and went for a little ride on The Great Space Coaster (oh-oh-oh). During his trip, the toad who provided his itinerary also told “Iron” to get back in shape and return to boxing.

“I did this toad, this DMT stuff and I lost the weight. I don’t know what happened, I just said I’m going to do this,” Tyson said. “I did this toad and the toad said, ‘you gotta do this… you have to do it.”

“The toad told you?” Rogan asked. “The DMT toad told you, you have to fight?”

“Yeah, ‘You have to do it’ and I lost the weight,” Tyson explained.

“It started with me fighting Bob Sapp, that was going to be the first fight. The fight with Roy Jones was supposed to be with Bob Sapp,” Tyson continued. “Roy Jones got involved, other fighters got involved, [Evander] Holyfield got involved and it turned into a fiasco. Then the young guy, Jake Paul, he got involved and that’s how the birth of Jake Paul became.”

Maybe Drederick Tatum should have been licking those toads instead of Homer Simpson.

Tyson returned to the “sweet science” to box Roy Jones Jr. back in late 2020 and despite an impressive performance, went back to his retired life in the wake of his draw under the Triller banner. Blame the party-pooping executives who (once again) got too greedy.

But one pay-per-view (PPV) from Tyson was all it took to give birth to the rise of Paul, though “Iron” argues “The Problem Child” was already the A-side and just needed an outlet to prove it. Perhaps we’ll have more evidence to support that theory if this potential boxing bout comes together.