Don’t Put Me In Coach! I’m Ready To Pay!

Don’t weep for Tai Tuivasa.

Instead, weep for the poor schmuck who gets the middle seat in “Bam Bam’s” row, because every flight going to (or from) Australia is a long one — which means several hours of breathing in beer farts and dried urine.

Fortunately for the chumps in economy, Tuivasa is now upgrading himself to first class. Whether or not you think UFCheap should be flying its event headliners in the front of the plane, as the Aussie said, is a story for another time.

But let’s face it, coach was not built for 273-pound heavyweights like Tuivasa.

“I pay for my own tickets,” Tuivasa told The MMA Hour. “I just get my own flights all the time. Most of my flights, I always pay for my own because I like to fly … I did a lot of time in the back of the plane, now it’s time to sit up in the front. I would agree (someone else should be paying for it) but that’s another argument for another time I suppose.”

Best thing about first class? You don’t have to share a bathroom with “bitch-ass cowards.”

After dropping three in a row and fighting for his job, Tuivasa (13-3) went on to win five straight — all by way of knockout — including his second-round destruction of Derrick Lewis as part of the UFC 271 pay-per-view (PPV) card last February.

His next assignment comes against Ciryl Gane in the UFC Paris main event on Sept. 3.

Gane (10-1) is currently ranked No. 1 at 265 pounds, one spot above former champion Stipe Miocic. “Bon Gamin” is looking to bounce back from his unanimous decision loss to reigning champion Francis Ngannou at UFC 270 in Anaheim.

To see who else is fighting at UFC Paris click here.