The Rock, Cormier Outed As Twins

“The embryo did split in two, but it didn’t split equally. All the purity and strength went into Julius. All the crap that was left over went into what you see in the mirror every morning.”

I would love to have the kind of friendship with my bro-squad where I could reach for things and they would meet me halfway, kind of like how Dwayne Johnson threw Daniel Cormier a good-natured lifeline when the UFC heavyweight claimed to resemble the former WWE champion.

Instead, my (cough) “friends” tell me to sit down and shut the (expletive) up.

Jerks.

“So here’s the deal, I was shown three copies [of] the poster,” Cormier said about the artwork for his “DC & Helwani” show on ESPN (via Heavy). “The first one was a little pudgy, you know, then I said ‘Make him a little less pudgy’ and then he made him a little less pudgy. And then I said ‘Shave his head. Make his face look like mine but like The Rock, and then I want my body to look like The Rock.’ People are hatin’ because I look like Dwayne Johnson. It’s not my fault that there’s a very strong resemblance between me and The Rock.”

Any resemblance would have to first start with a milk crate to make up for the six-inch height discrepancy between Cormier (5’11”) and Johnson (6’5”).

“Man this gave me a good laugh,” Johnson replied on Twitter. “Me and my brother [Daniel Cormier] are pretty much identical twins. Get over [it] people. Sheesh.”

Cormier will (hopefully) make his UFC return against Stipe Miocic later this year.